we are in PICU....

Doctor feels that surgery went well and he was able to do everything he set out to do. It was a little shorter than the 3 hours. he took out a silver dollar size piece of skull and some of the first vertabrae. Opened the dura and put in a patch made from bovine tendon. it was almost an hour before they came to take us to see him in PACU. Sam had a massive headache when he came around. they gave him some morphine, valium and toradol. Then got dad and I. Sam woke a bit after we got to him and was still in pain so they gave him a bit more morphine. He fell back to sleep for a bit. when he woke up the next time he asked why his head doesn't hurt! this all happened in the PACU (post anesthia care unit). We are now settled in the PICU for the first night. he complained about the cathedar so that has been removed. he has also asked for toys. That is why he wanted to come to the hospital in the first place! He is also enjoying the cable tv. We don't have cable at home so this is a treat. he has a PICU doctor assigned to his care and the doctor is very pleased to see how much he is moving around. Said he is looking very good right now.

Surgery is going on....

I got up about 4:30, suprisingly I wasn't awake watching the time. The alarm actually woke me up. We got to the hospital ok and through all thier stuff.Sam seemed ok with everything. He wanted to watch a movie and picked out Monsters, Inc but that proved to be to much scary stuff. So we switched to a marvel super hero one and drifted off to sleep with me holding the portable DVD player up so he can see it iver the mask. He didn't like the smell of the gas and got a little upset at that. It was about 8:25 when I came out of the OR. We are now settled into the PICU and waiting word. Richard got the other kids off to school and I assume that went ok. He should be up here shortly.

Just a few hours now.....

Well we leave at 5:45am for sam's surgery. He has cleared the pre op physical with our PCP and then the nuerologist checked him again today. he's good to go. I need to go put the clean sheets on the bed and pack a few more things. I think I have gotten to a place of no feeling, mabey it is better described as a calmness. it helped that it was a beautiful sun shiney day out today and I was busy getting everything in place. Sam is so excited it is here. He has been talking to people at school telling everything that is going to be done. He will have one more big headache then it will get better. Please pray that all goes well with the surgery, and he his healing goes smoothly. About 1 in 4 get aseptic menigitis following this surery. Pray that all goes well on the home front.

3 Days...

Well it's almost midnight so I could say 2. This morning at church was so good. I was so disappointed to not be able to go to the woman's retreat this year. By the time I left church I felt so loved and supported by my church family. Even a lady I don't really know stopped to say she was praying for us. It was good that I was there. Plus I found Sam's iXL in the van that gave us a ride home Easter Sunday, or I should say Rose did! Sam is doing pretty good with it all. We went to a couple of parks today and Sam had to take a break and lay downfor a bit because of a headache.

So they start....

I was wondering the other day why I didn't have any dreams about the surgery yet. Well they started this morning. It included such things as being at the wrong place, walking to the hospital and being late, two kids scheduled for surgery at the same time and I was focussing on the other child who had eaten something but was saying no and forgot to make sure Sam didn't eat. 4 days.

Finally......

Joshua 1:9 (King James Version)
9Have not I commanded thee? Be strong and of a good courage; be not afraid, neither be thou dismayed: for the LORD thy God is with thee whithersoever thou goest.

Proverbs 3:5-6 (King James Version)
5Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.
6In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.

Psalm 30:11-12 (King James Version)
11Thou hast turned for me my mourning into dancing: thou hast put off my sackcloth, and girded me with gladness;
12To the end that my glory may sing praise to thee, and not be silent. O LORD my God, I will give thanks unto thee for ever.

Philippians 4:6-7 (King James Version)
6Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God.
7And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.

Blogger is down so I’m putting this into Word and will cut and paste later. This morning I went to facebook and the first three verses show up in my feed. Three different people put these verses in their status and they all came together for me. I’m not sure how I see dancing about Sam’s surgery, but be not afraid I will not be alone. God will take away my mourning. Last night at church I went forward for prayer for the surgery and my coping of it. I’m not alone. Wednesday was a quiet day while the older ones were at school and I started to freak some being mostly alone with my thoughts. I’m not alone came through again and again with the men I prayed with. One of them shared Phil 4:6-7. That verse jumped out at me a few months ago while I was waiting for results of biopsies. God understands, I don’t need to. Even if doctors don’t figure out exactly what is going on with Sam, God understands.

There are times I am so afraid that this is starting Sam down a road of repeated brain surgeries. Then I tell myself he has done remarkably well with surgeries in the past year. He has had pleanty of practice with 5 in the last year, and two sedated MRIs. This unkown is so hard. But isn’t that all of life?

Sam is doing well. He was a little more tired today and had a headache again this afternoon. He was strapped into his carseat when he told us and I was grateful we made it to our destination without it escalating to severly. He also had his last therepy before surgery. We are to play it by ear, mabey check in after surgery, definitely after we see Dr Healy next month. I pray he stays healthy until Wednesday so we do not have to delay the surgery. He is loving his calendar and so careful to keep it up. He crosses of a day each night and each morning he tears off a chain.

Ok this was written 5/12 and finally I could get in and post 5/13.

7 days....

Sam remains excited about surgery and continually asks when we can go to the hospital. As soon as I can find the stapler, I'm going to make him a chain to help count down the days. I however am a bundle of nerves. Little things like running out of dish soap two days before payday, and a chance to get more, are bringing me to tears. Pre-Op called last night to go over things before surgery.